My Best Life

This week my daughter Shawnee started dance competition. At the location I saw a sign that said “a few kind words can help someone more than you think, you never know what they may be going through”. I love this so much, it’s so true. We all have our own struggles and a few kind words can change someone’s day.

During our drive to the competition, Shawnee and I were talking about the importance of our words to our own well being. Words are powerful, to the universe, to our mental health and to others.

How often do you hear people say “I’m so unlucky” or “that’s just my luck”? Well yeah it is, try believing you’re lucky, you’re lucky you woke up today, you’re lucky to eat today, you’re lucky for … (Fill in the blank). We are more blessed than we realize.

I’m bad at talking my self down, “I’ve gained so much weight”, “I’m so forgetful”, and so on. This takes a mental toll on us. On Wednesday I was talking to another dance mom. I have admired her for years, I think she’s so beautiful, happy, kind and just perfect in my eyes. She was telling me how she started a new exercise and health program. Anyways I found out we are the same weight, something I beat myself up over. She also told me about some of her challenges in life. Then started sharing why she thinks I’m great, why I’m strong and inspiring to her and others. How can someone so perfect in my eyes, be so similar to me when I’m so far from perfect? Well I have two answers for that. First, no one is perfect, we need to stop putting others on such a higher level than ourselves. Second, we are to freaking hard on ourselves. We need to start looking at ourselves they way we look at those we admire and start to admire ourselves.

So realize your words matter, not only to others, but to ourselves too. Try building yourself up, realize that you are a beautiful person and capable of so much more than you realize.

Over the weekend, I challenge you to use your words carefully. I challenge you to compliment yourself, build yourself up a d not tear yourself down. Remember no one is perfect, bit let’s try to remember how great we really are. You are amazing, I am amazing, so let’s live our best life.

Xoxo

Charlotte

In manifestation vibrations are commonly talked about. This basically means emotions. You want to keep your emotions in a high or happy state. Keeping your vibrations high help you manifest your desires and frankly improve your day.Every night when I go to sleep, I listen to some kind meditation. This helps keep my vibration high through sleep, when our subconscious mind is most open to reprograming. I find on days I don’t go to sleep this way, I am not in as good of a mood the following morning and easily irritated.We all have to find our own way of keeping our vibrations high. For some it’s music, singing along to a favorite song is a great way to improve your mood. For me it’s my night meditations and morning motivational pod casts. Find what works for you and see the changes happen faster than you know. Laugh off the mishaps throughout the day, smile at the people you pass by and love living your best life.XoxoCharlotte

As I’ve mentioned before, I have a chronic illness. This can make life difficult at times. I struggle at times to even get out of bed. This is part of my life that I’m learning to accept.

I try to get up early every morning. One thing I’ve been trying to incorporate in my life is meditation and yoga. Getting up just an hour before I’m required to allows me to take my time and wake up in a good way.

I’ve already talked about how I count my blessings and show gratitude as soon as I wake up. After that I do a simple ten minutes of yoga and a short meditation. This jump starts my day.

Even if I physically can’t do anything more that day, I know I’ve accomplished something. Something that helps keep my mind healthy and my joints moving.

This week I’m going to try biking. I’ll start just around my neighborhood and one day I’ll get up to more. Small steps to improve my health and body.

Never say never and remember starting small is okay. Every little bit counts. For me being chronically ill, ten minutes of yoga is a huge accomplishment. So never think it’s not enough, no matter how small of a step, it’s still a step. Be proud of yourself and your accomplishments toward living your best life.

Xoxo

Charlotte

When I first started dating my husband and we had a disagreement or something upset me, I’d say “you hurt my feelings” or “you made me mad” anything along those lines. He’d respond with something like “I can’t make you feel anything, you do that.” Well that just pissed me off even more. It wasn’t until years later that I really understood this.

We all have situations and people that piss us off, but is it really them? Or is it us? Feelings are with in ourselves and they can change in an instant. I’ve learned that we can control our emotions and feelings.

In the movie The Secret, they talk about the vibrations we emit. The movie uses the example of getting out of bed and stubbing your toe, squeezing the toothpaste and it gets on your shirt. A common mishap for me is spilling my coffee on me, it’s almost a daily incident. Many refer to this as ‘getting up on the wrong side of the bed’, and typically it sets us up for a bad day. I just laugh anytime it happens, and think about the movie.

We can choose if we are going to let it affect our happiness. I have a quote on my bedroom wall “wake up every morning with the thought that something wonderful is going to happen”. If we choose to be happy, out day will go so much better. No matter what happens, try to look for the good in the situation and find the happiness within yourself.

Facing adversity can be made easier when done with a smile and happiness in your heart. If you need proof, look up videos of cancer patients on their last day of chemo, ringing the bell. No matter how weak, sick or tired, you will see such energy and true happiness. If these patients can find happiness, so can we.

I hope you all decide to be happy today, tomorrow and all the days to come because it feels wonderful. Smile today and live your best life.

Xoxo

Charlotte

For as long as I can remember I’ve been journaling. Unlike most people, I’ve never kept my journals or a diary. I’d commonly write my thoughts and feelings down and then let them go. This was my way of sharing my thoughts with the universe.

If something was upsetting me, writing my feelings down and releasing them helped me move on. I’ve never been good at talking others how I feel, so I’d write them a letter. This helped me to get my feelings out with out conflict or risk of embarrassment. Then I’d rip it up and let it go, never showing it to anyone. This has always been a healing process for me. A way for me to forgive myself, forgive others.

Over the past few years, I’ve learned this can work for my goals and dreams as well. It’s more than goals and dreams though, it’s more like intentions. When you write down the intentions for your life and put it out to the universe, magic happens. This helps make it real in your heart, but once done, let it go and continue with your day.

Letting go doesn’t mean giving up or forgetting. It means don’t dwell on it. Many have said it before me and I’ll reiterate it now, ‘thoughts become things’. Although if you dwell on the intentions, you might do more harm than good. If it doesn’t happen right away, you might lose hope, question yourself. That’s counterproductive, releasing your intention, acknowledges it, without the doubt. You can do it all over again the next morning to reiterate your intention. 

So give it a try, dream big, dream hard and release it. You might be surprised at the outcome, that will lead to your best life.

Xoxo

Charlotte

In step one I talked about reducing stress, how stress does the offer us anything positive, it never helps the situation.

Step two is probably the most important thing you will learn. Gratitude. We need to learn gratitude for the things we already have. Wake up in the morning and spend a moment being grateful, before you even get out of bed.

I am so happy and grateful for the sleep I had, that I woke up today, the air I breathe. Show gratitude for everyday things we take for granted. Then once up get up you can continue. I practice gratitude when I get ready, after the basics I move on to more specific things. I’m grateful for this make up, for these clothes, for my coffee, my car or transit pass. I’m grateful for the TV and news report, the music I listen to. Be grateful for anything and everything.

Showing gratitude raised your vibration, your mood, and it just makes you feel good. This will help start your day right. Then if something doesn’t go your way, like you spill coffee on your shirt (something I do all the time), you can just shrug it off and move on.

Through out your day, you can turn anything into gratitude. Of you’re sick and at the doctors, be grateful you have access to medical care. You get in a car accident, be grateful your alive. Changing the way you look at things can help improve your day.

How many of us grew up with the saying ‘bad things happen in threes’? Well they don’t have too. So often we wait for the other shoe to drop, but what happens if you don’t expect crap to fall down around you? Chances are it won’t, or at least if you change your thinking around the situation, it won’t seem bad. Look for a reason to be grateful, even in the worst of times.

This can chance your life and start you on a path to manifesting something great. You will begin to see the good in life, you’ll realize your life is better than you thought and will enjoy it more. You will find your happiness. You will find your best life.

Xoxo

Charlotte

I’ve always had a saying, Dream and Believe. I even have it tattooed on my left arm. We all have dreams for our lives, but do you really believe that they can come true? Most of us don’t, we just call it day dreaming. Well I am a firm believer that you can achieve those dreams. I already told you about some of my unpleasant manifestations, today I’m going to share so amazing manifestations.

In 2010/2011 when I first wrote Immortal Embrace, I knew I was going to find a publisher. Now don’t get me wrong, I got as many rejections as the next person. Then I got two publishing house offers. WOW! Once I signed my contract with World Castle Publishing, we started on the publishing process, a dream come true. I never really thought of this as manifesting a contract, but I guess it really was. Immortal Embrace, my debut novel was released July of 2011. Now this is when I really started manifesting. I printed off Best Seller titles and posted them up, I wrote in my journal that I was going to be a best selling author by January first, 2012. I believed this dream and I felt it with every inch of my being.

January first came and I wasn’t a best selling author yet, but I still knew it was coming. Well later in the month, I hit the top of the charts in my categories on Amazon, and my publisher sent me a beautiful best seller certificate. I was January’s best seller for our entire publishing house. Yay, I did it, albeit a little late, but I’m not complaining. Now it might not be New York Times or USA Today list, but I still got what I asked for. This is why so many LOA guru’s tell you to be clear on your intentions. I am still happier than a kid in a candy store.

Now another great story, My husband was laid off. He was our families main financial support. About six weeks after his lay off, he began to get very stressed. He had applied for every job he could find and nothing. I sat down with him and gave him a little encouragement. I told him to make a list of things he wants, but to do it as if he already has what he wants. He decided to humor me. The first item on is list was, “I have an amazing job, with a good company and great pay.” He completed his list, put the pen down and decided to let the universe do it’s work. Within five minutes he received a phone call, he was offered a fantastic job, with better pay than he had ever had. He started a week later.

As you can see putting your intention out there can help you achieve miracles. Believe in yourself, your dreams, and that you are deserving of all you want in life and things will start happening for you. Know that it is coming, feel it and put trust in your dreams. So you can live your best life.

XOXO

Charlotte

On Monday my post was “We all have bad days”. Some of you might be wondering why, if I believe in manifestation and the Law of Attraction, why would I have bad days? Why would I have the health issues I have? Why not just manifest health.

Well the answer is simple. I manifested my health issues, and I haven’t gotten to the point of manifesting health yet.

WHAT?

Well let’s address why I haven’t manifested health yet. I’m still early in understanding manifestation. In a little less than a decade that I have become aware of The Law of Attraction, I have focused on other things. Happiness, security, relationships, my writing. It actually didn’t even occur to me until this past weekend that I can actually manifest health, and I absolutely plan on it.

Now, why am I “sick”? Who would manifest illness? We all do this without even realizing it. That’s exactly what I did. I’m sure you’ve all heard the term, “thoughts become things”. Well heck yeah they do!

Let’s get a little of my history. I have lost many people in my family to cancer, both grandmother’s, my grandfather, my dad all passed from cancer. I have a strong family history. My oldest sister had pre-cancer cells, I had pre-cancer cells, my other sister had and survived cancer. When we go to the doctor, they ask us family history. I used to say that I was positive I’d get cancer one day. After all I’m predisposed to it and can’t change my family history.

My sister that had cancer, has a multitude of health problems. She’s considered disabled because of all them. To say she’s struggles is an understatement. I will say I never truely understood how much until I became ill myself. I used to get so frustrated with her, thinking why can’t she… Why doesn’t she… And so on, all the things many of us say when we don’t understand chronic illness. I said, “Ugh, I wish I’d get sick just so I can show her how it’s done. So I can show her you can push through”. Well there you have it, I brought this on myself. I manifested illness, disability and all the things I wished my sister would push through. Can we say Karma is a bitch?

Now I don’t have cancer, I have an autoimmune disease. Which commonly is treated with chemotherapy, a treatment for cancer. Thankfully I’m not at that point for treatment. I have spent months, years unable to function normally, unable to hold down a full time job, days where I can’t get out of bed, cook for my kids, clean my house. You know what I found out, you can’t always push through it. So to my sister (whom I’ve never told any of this too), I’m sorry for all my misconceptions. You are stronger than I ever knew.

As you can see I manifested all this, without even realizing it. “Thoughts become things”. This is why we need to stop these negative thoughts in their tracks. The age old saying, “be careful what you wish for”. Yeah well I think I proved that theory.

How has this changed me? That is simple, I am conscious of every thought that goes through my mind. I try to not validate bad thoughts and I replace them with good thoughts. I have noticed that I have so much more joy in my life. Yes, I need to still work on my health and I will.

I had told you in a previous post that step one to My Best Life was not to stress. I stand by this, and that’s why I don’t stress about what I created in my life. I have to change my thoughts to change my life. You can do it too.

Xoxo

Charlotte

So the past few days I’ve been struggling. I’ve gone into an autoimmune flare, and with that comes so many challenges. I live everyday of my life in pain, and have accepted that (at least for now). Although when I’m in a flare, the pain increases, I have widespread inflammation, chronic fatigue, increased headaches and so much more. This weekend I struggled to walk because of the pain in my ankle and foot. My depression increases when I’m in a flare, and am just not well.

It’s okay, we all have bad days. I work that much harder on bad days on my positivity. One thing that works for me is listening to music, it takes me to my happy place. I have a few songs that just instantly increase my mood and vibration. I’ll share them with you, cause who can’t use some good music?

“A life that’s good” by Lennon and Maisy Stella for the tv show Nashville. It’s a great country song performed by two young sisters (and yeah they are Canadian). This is a great song to help you realize all you have to be grateful for.

Next is my all time favorite band, “Who do you love?” By Marianas Trench. Okay so anything by them lifts my mood, but its not just the song, it’s the video. The band and their family go around their hometown of Vancouver, BC and spread joy. Give it a watch, it’s so heart warming and because of that, probably my favorite music video.

Now the next song just gets my heart pumping. Everyone that knows me knows this song is 100% me. Every line speaks right to what I feel, believe and dream. “High Hopes” by Panic at the Disco. They are a band from Las Vegas, and well let’s just say when I’m driving and this comes on, it’s a dance party in the car and everyone around gets entertained.

So if you’re having a bad day, just find what makes you happy and remember, stress doesn’t help anything. I hope you live you best life.

Xoxo

Charlotte

On this journey to live my best life, I have found a few things that have helped me. Now although I believe in the law of attraction, I’m not gonna sit here and tell you to visualize a better life. I believe there’s so much more to it than that. I’m not gonna blow smoke up your ass and then be like hey for $1500 I’ll give you my secret. I am by no means a trained life coach or a Guru.

I’m will share what I do that works. And incase you’re wondering, I do still visualize and make visions boards and all that. I’ll save that for another post though.

So step one is something I’ve not only practiced, but I’ve preached for years. I don’t think I could’ve done anything else before this. It had to be first, at least for me.

Going through life we all have good things, bad things, and just the normal everyday things. Each causes their own set of feelings. One that I felt lots was stress. I worried about everything and sometimes I still do, but I do my best to turn every stressful situation into something else.

Step one is don’t stress. Yeah easier said then done, right? Sit back, and think of stressful situations you’ve faced. Now ask yourself, did stressing about it help the situation? Not likely. Did it create other issues for you? Yeah probably.

It’s scientifically proven that stress affect our bodies in various ways. In stressful situations the body releases two hormones, adrenaline and cortisol. This causes physiological responses, increased heart rate, blood pressure, respirations. It can affect your body in ways from sleep, bowl movements, mental status, even heart disease and so much more. For me a huge reaction is an autoimmune flare and that’s not fun.

Now we talked about some of the things stress can do, let’s look at what stress cannot do. Stress cannot make you feel better, it can’t solve the problem, it can’t bring you peace or pay that bill you’re late on. Stress cannot fix anything, so why stress? Well it’s a part of life, right? Wrong!

Stressful situations don’t require a stress reaction. I personally always try to remind myself that it won’t help. I remember that things always work out and will get better. Even if you’re at rock bottom, well the only way to go is up. Try and learn from the situation so you can avoid it.

I like to take a few breathes, meditate or listen to a positivity pod cast. “Professional optimist” Mel Robbins has a rule of 5, check it out. Basically she says count backwards from 5 to give your mind a kind of reset. It’s pretty cool. She does short daily lives on social media that are great for a boost of encouragement. Try and find your go-to to stop stress it’s tracks and focus on how to actually work with the situation that is causing it.

So there you have it, my first rule to all this positive thinking, manifestation, law of attraction stuff. Eliminate stress so you can live your best life.

Please comment with things you do to help reduce or eliminate stress. You never know who you might help.

Xoxo Charlotte